xmas eve.
sayulita, mexico.
solo.



















Several years ago I agreed with much trepidation, and on a trial basis, to try an every other xmas plan in regards to custody of my boy. The first year was blissful as I shared every magical moment with PickleBoy at my side.
But ,
then ,
as the second year of the arrangement began to loom,
heavy clouds of anxiety gathered around me.
However would I make it through?

My Sister started in on me and didn't let up until I hit the 'purchase' button for my airplane ticket to Mexico. Just 1 ticket. I had been to Mexico many times before and I speak just enough of the language to get by, but,
alone?

I boarded the plane on December 22nd. Melancholy music poured into my ears as I stared out the little oval watching the world speed away beneath me, a few tears. Three hours later my taxi driver sped me the thirty five miles north of the Puerto Vallarta airport to the little village and we chatted about all sorts of things - he spoke no English. "Hey, maybe I know more than I think I do!" ran through my head as he popped open his trunk and showed me the toys he had bought to give to his children for xmas and beamed at me with a big beautiful smile...my bungalow had an outdoor kitchen and living room with a hammock...I walked through an old cemetary to get to the gentle beach...I bought handmade shrimp tamales off the back of a happy, wizened old man's four wheeler for lunch and ran into the ocean to wash my hands...I sipped tequila con hielo y limon that I'd bought at the liquor store as I watched the sun sink into the Pacific...I hiked forty five minutes through the jungle to find a huge deserted beach I had heard about...I made friends from Canada that I will visit someday...I ate 'street' tacos from the stand on the corner...I dozed away several afternoons lying in the sand and letting the salt dry and crystallize on my arms...and so much more.

I found some of me that I had not known before.
I liked what I found.

more spc here...